So it’s been a long time since I’ve written a post! I’ve been busy lately, working at an architecture firm. My time there seems to have confirmed my passion for the profession. LaoTsu (i think?) once said (cheesy quote alert) , and i agree, “Pick a job you love, and you’ll never have to work a day in your life”.
Yet my ever-pragmatic parents were on hand to point out that upon deciding to take up architecture as a profession I will have to forgo my indulgence in the finer points of life for the simple fact that it’s not exactly the highest paying profession. Parents are, more often than not, irritatingly correct.
I’ve long debated this with myself - to love my work but not getting much money, or become a corporate zombie making lots of money but not really loving my work.
“…And so the heavens parted and behold a great beam shone from the sky and in a booming voice my path was revealed.” Okay so maybe not quite as theatrically, but in just as awe-inspiring a moment, God gave me a little idea - to take a scholarship.
Why did I not think of it earlier? The simple answer is that I did consider applying for a scholarship earlier - but the fear of being bonded to something for 6 years always held me back. Growing up, I never really knew what to do with my life, all Iknew was that I wanted to be in control. And despite what LaoTsu may say, I was always afraid that working in the architectural line would make architecture a job and no longer a passion - that I would no longer associate it with the perfect marriage of function and beauty, of rationality and aesthetics, so much as associate it with work and labour and all the negative-conotations those two words bear towards an easy-going (see lazy) guy like me.
Worst-case scenario: I take an architectural scholarship lasting 6 years of study + 6 years of bond, realize I don’t want to work in architecture, and end up quitting at the end of my 6 year bond (fast approaching my mid-30s) and having to restudy for another profession because my architecture training is too specific to the profession to let me go into another area of work. Not a nice picture - midlife crisis to the max.
Sorry for the long explanation and slight digression but going back to the crux of the matter - my main problem with scholarships is the bond. Not theologically accurate, yes, but I find myself wanting to be in control of my life. It is only natural. But lately, a verse has been stuck in my mind:
Isaiah 55:8-9
New International Version (NIV)
8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the LORD.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts. “
Back to where this post started - with me working at the architecture firm for the past two weeks. Working at the firm has made me realize that I do want to be an architect and this confirmation has undone my fear of being bonded to something I may not like. Hence, I decided to apply for an architecture scholarship.
Bringing this post full-circle is God’s hand in the whole issue of my career. It seems all-too-timely that I would think of applying for a scholarship a mere week before deadlines close, and that the internship (which was of utmost importance in convincing me of my love for the art) would start two weeks before the application deadline. I also think it’s miraculous how I was able to finally come around to the idea of taking up a scholarship because, seriously, I did not want to surrender my life to some company for 12 years.
To close, I think God’s trying to tell me to trust Him more. His more than timely intervention in revealing a possible career path, in opening the door just before the application window closes, is Him trying to tell me that He’ll open the doors for me when He’s ready.
Now all that remains is to pray - that my scholarship application will be successful if it is indeed His plan that I should go into it, or alternatively that God will grant me understanding if He decides to close the door for me.For His ways are higher than my ways.
